Da 'Gang a Six'.....January, 2014
Rocky bangs on the Senator's door.....Bam...bam...bam!
"Hey Rocky..ain't you supposed to knock po..litely!"
"Dis is my po..lite knock kid."
The door opened and there stood the Senator himself.
"Ah...Rocky...isn't it"
"You got a good memory Senator, dat tarp bill was a long time ago." Rocky began to giggle, an odd sight for a pudgy, stout, bowling ball of man.
"Heh heh, sorry bout dat but I put a few 'Bills' in a tarp in my day but never a tarp in a Bill. Dis is my friend T-bone. I'm learning him da trade."
"Well, Rocky...and... T-bone...what can I help you with? I have to be present for a roll call in ten minutes."
"Heh heh" Rocky giggled again as he lifted his fat hand to his mouth..
"Something funny in dat...er...that... Rocky?"
"No...Well yeah. It reminds me of da roll calls I used to have to show up at in da pen. Dem was good times."
The Senator's eyes rolled and he looked around to see if his secretary was in earshot. She wasn't.
"Once again Rocky, what can I help you with?"
"Well, da gang a six sent me over here with a gift." He giggled again and apologized. "Sorry bout dat again, but I bin in a lotta gangs in my tirty-tree years on da street, and even a few in my tirty years of being incarcerated for crimes I never admitted ta doin, but I mean deez guys are more like dos' hucksters dat roust ya up to see da bearded lady at da circus. Know what I mean....but I guess dey are pretty good at scarin old ladies." He stretched out his hand with the envelope. "Its tickets to da opra."
"The Opera?"
"Yeah, its Rigoletto. Dats my favorite."
"You're...you're a fan of the opera?"
"Yeah. Well just dis one. I like da part where the guy stuffs the body in da sack. I been dere...know what I mean?."
The senator looked around again and said hurriedly. "Thank you Rocky and If I can, I'll try to make the opera but we have been awful busy lately with budget talks."
"Oh, I don't tink you'll be busy dat day." He pulled a large handful of envelopes out a bag that T-bone was carrying. "I got free tickets here for all da Democrat Senators, and even a few for dose udder ones. Da 'gang a six'...heh heh...says dere's a good message in dis opera and dey
wants to make sure everyone gets dat message."
"Well thank you again. Good-bye."
He started to close the door but Rocky stuck his foot in it for one more comment.
"You know. I bin tinkin about runnin to be a Senator."
"Really?"
"Yeah. I'm gettin too old for dis business. Such is why I am learning T-bone here. Da next time I gotta deliver tickets or a dead fish or sump'm, it'll probably be T-bone here. I figger if Al Franken can make it, den I can"
The Senator nodded and said " You may have a point there," and was about to close the door but could not help but asking. "Ah, Rocky. And what state would you be ...runnin...in?"
"Ya mean ya get to pick one? I tink I might like to be da Senator from Las Vegas?"
With this the Senator did close the door.
"Hey Rocky..ain't you supposed to knock po..litely!"
"Dis is my po..lite knock kid."
The door opened and there stood the Senator himself.
"Ah...Rocky...isn't it"
"You got a good memory Senator, dat tarp bill was a long time ago." Rocky began to giggle, an odd sight for a pudgy, stout, bowling ball of man.
"Heh heh, sorry bout dat but I put a few 'Bills' in a tarp in my day but never a tarp in a Bill. Dis is my friend T-bone. I'm learning him da trade."
"Well, Rocky...and... T-bone...what can I help you with? I have to be present for a roll call in ten minutes."
"Heh heh" Rocky giggled again as he lifted his fat hand to his mouth..
"Something funny in dat...er...that... Rocky?"
"No...Well yeah. It reminds me of da roll calls I used to have to show up at in da pen. Dem was good times."
The Senator's eyes rolled and he looked around to see if his secretary was in earshot. She wasn't.
"Once again Rocky, what can I help you with?"
"Well, da gang a six sent me over here with a gift." He giggled again and apologized. "Sorry bout dat again, but I bin in a lotta gangs in my tirty-tree years on da street, and even a few in my tirty years of being incarcerated for crimes I never admitted ta doin, but I mean deez guys are more like dos' hucksters dat roust ya up to see da bearded lady at da circus. Know what I mean....but I guess dey are pretty good at scarin old ladies." He stretched out his hand with the envelope. "Its tickets to da opra."
"The Opera?"
"Yeah, its Rigoletto. Dats my favorite."
"You're...you're a fan of the opera?"
"Yeah. Well just dis one. I like da part where the guy stuffs the body in da sack. I been dere...know what I mean?."
The senator looked around again and said hurriedly. "Thank you Rocky and If I can, I'll try to make the opera but we have been awful busy lately with budget talks."
"Oh, I don't tink you'll be busy dat day." He pulled a large handful of envelopes out a bag that T-bone was carrying. "I got free tickets here for all da Democrat Senators, and even a few for dose udder ones. Da 'gang a six'...heh heh...says dere's a good message in dis opera and dey
wants to make sure everyone gets dat message."
"Well thank you again. Good-bye."
He started to close the door but Rocky stuck his foot in it for one more comment.
"You know. I bin tinkin about runnin to be a Senator."
"Really?"
"Yeah. I'm gettin too old for dis business. Such is why I am learning T-bone here. Da next time I gotta deliver tickets or a dead fish or sump'm, it'll probably be T-bone here. I figger if Al Franken can make it, den I can"
The Senator nodded and said " You may have a point there," and was about to close the door but could not help but asking. "Ah, Rocky. And what state would you be ...runnin...in?"
"Ya mean ya get to pick one? I tink I might like to be da Senator from Las Vegas?"
With this the Senator did close the door.
AND AGAIN...
Bam...bam...bam!
The door opens at the senator's home.
"Well...Rocky....It's been a while. I thought you were going to retire?"
"And so I did Senator. I been sittin' in my easy chair for over a year watching dat Jerry Springer. In case I ever have to woik for him."
"You mean on his television show?"
"No, if he becomes a Dem Senator."
"It was....T-bone....wasn't it, who was supposed to replace you?"
"Hey, you remembered T-bone! He had a very unfortunate accident and I had to come back to woik."
"I'm sorry to hear that."
"Yeah, so was he."
"What happened?"
"....Ah....He slipped on a patch of ice."
"Rocky, we haven't had any ice yet this fall."
"Did I say ice. I meant leaves...a patch a leaves, but dey was goin to...lay him off...heh heh... anyway for he had a nasty habit of asking too many questions."
"Questions...like what?"
"Like.....where'd you get dose shoes....or....got any gum on you. Our motto is 'ours ain't to wonder why, ours but to do and lie'."
"Ah...Alfred Lord... Tennyson!"
"No... Dingy Harry... Reid."
"Well anyway, to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit this time?"
Rocky reached in his pants pocket and pulled out a snub nosed 38 and the senator immediately stiffened.
"Hey hey, no worries Senator I'm just looking for...." he pulled out two bolts...and a half-eaten tuna sandwich..."here dey are"... holding two pennies out to the Senator.
"Two pennies?"
"Yeah....two cents. Senator H. saw your comments on television yesterday, you know where you said you were just putting your two cents wort in on dat fiscal cliff thing...heh heh."
"What's so funny?"
"Oh dat....fiscal cliff....It makes me tink a da good ole days when my woik day would offen end up at da edge of a cliff."
"And the two cents?"
"Well, da Senator says dat dis is da two cents for your comments and if you should ever feel da need to give your two cents worth again....dey will be da last two cents you ever get from da Dems....heh heh. Dat guy may look like a prune but he really got a sense of humor...get it...'cents' of humor?"
"I get it Rocky. Thank-you again....and aah...Good-bye."
"You mean on his television show?"
"No, if he becomes a Dem Senator."
"It was....T-bone....wasn't it, who was supposed to replace you?"
"Hey, you remembered T-bone! He had a very unfortunate accident and I had to come back to woik."
"I'm sorry to hear that."
"Yeah, so was he."
"What happened?"
"....Ah....He slipped on a patch of ice."
"Rocky, we haven't had any ice yet this fall."
"Did I say ice. I meant leaves...a patch a leaves, but dey was goin to...lay him off...heh heh... anyway for he had a nasty habit of asking too many questions."
"Questions...like what?"
"Like.....where'd you get dose shoes....or....got any gum on you. Our motto is 'ours ain't to wonder why, ours but to do and lie'."
"Ah...Alfred Lord... Tennyson!"
"No... Dingy Harry... Reid."
"Well anyway, to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit this time?"
Rocky reached in his pants pocket and pulled out a snub nosed 38 and the senator immediately stiffened.
"Hey hey, no worries Senator I'm just looking for...." he pulled out two bolts...and a half-eaten tuna sandwich..."here dey are"... holding two pennies out to the Senator.
"Two pennies?"
"Yeah....two cents. Senator H. saw your comments on television yesterday, you know where you said you were just putting your two cents wort in on dat fiscal cliff thing...heh heh."
"What's so funny?"
"Oh dat....fiscal cliff....It makes me tink a da good ole days when my woik day would offen end up at da edge of a cliff."
"And the two cents?"
"Well, da Senator says dat dis is da two cents for your comments and if you should ever feel da need to give your two cents worth again....dey will be da last two cents you ever get from da Dems....heh heh. Dat guy may look like a prune but he really got a sense of humor...get it...'cents' of humor?"
"I get it Rocky. Thank-you again....and aah...Good-bye."
